You’ll be pleased to know Chicken Wizard is about to be printed. I have already taken pre-orders for this book, my first picture book aimed at 7- to 9-year-olds. Like all first print runs this is likely to do well.
I’ve seen Aquasapien 1st Edition going for £22 second-hand via on-line book shops.
If you’d like to pre-order just leave your details on the contact page and I’ll contact you as soon as they reach my hands.
I’m all set to start my next picture book, Shea Pingle and the Swarm, aimed at 9-to 11-yr-olds. Shea Pingle is a fairy who works as a Bee Botherer. Her job is to wake the local hive each morning, then travel around the flowers during the day to wake any bees caught dozing.
I’ve been super busy these last few weeks despite recovering from my spine issue and paralysis. On 22nd April I was at a craft fair in Herne Bay selling and signing. The last weekend in April I went to Reeth in North Yorkshire to support my husband doing a charity walk.
Each year he, and five veteran chums, walked the Squaddie hike in Aid of the Queen’s Regiment Benevolent Fund. In the ensuing twelve months one of their number passed away from Bone cancer. Add to that one of our local buddy’s died of the same condition, and my hubby decided to walk the fifteen-mile distance alone in aid of the Bone Cancer Trust.
Monday fifteen of May saw me dashing up to Bluewater after work, following an invitation for Ewa & Louise to display and sell my work at the Under the Rainbow Art Exhibition and fashion show. The pieces of art on show are incredible. If you manage to get up there, do go and visit the exhibition.
This uplifting exhibition showcases both professional and emerging talent from across the UK. Alongside over 60 exhibiting artists, there will be other displays including local schools and community projects, as well as donated artwork for sale in support of local charity, My Shining Star.
The exhibition is open daily in the Lower Rose Gallery from 11 am to 8 pm Monday to Saturday, and 11 am to 5 pm on Sundays.
This Saturday just gone, I attended a signing and selling event at the Festival of Transport Faversham, and on the Sunday did a bit of recon at MarvelSC Comicon at Quex Park. It was busy and expensive, but it looked like everyone was having a good time. Plus, they have a marquee full of authors, so maybe next year, despite the cost. When I factor in hotels and travels, the large cost for a stall didn't seem quite so large.
On Saturday 3rd and Sunday 4th June I'm at Kent Fest, Quex. I’ve got a Craft Fair at Sandwich on 10th and 11th June, and another pop-up Bookshop in Broadstairs on 25th to 27th June.
Meanwhile, I continue to write. I'm waiting for Ellie, my latest illustrator to come back on-line once she finishes her art assignments. Then we'll begin illustrating Shea Pingle. I'm still editing the heck out of Between Here and Hell which slowed a bit following the dislocation of my thumb two weeks ago. Did I forget to say that?
Till next time, stay safe and well. Carol. M.
So much has happened in the last four weeks, it’s hard to believe it.
Today, was my day for spinal surgery, a discectomy. Removal of a herniated disc that was impinging on one of my spinal nerves. As I’m writing you can see that never happened. To recap, sciatica six months getting worse. Surgery today and 2nd MRI and 2nd consultation to confirm the week beforehand.
That all changed on Monday 13th March when the pain became intolerable. I couldn’t stand up at work. Had to be collected and taken home. I remember lying curled up in my hallway waiting for the analgesia I’d taken to work so I could crawl upstairs to bed.
As the pain eased, so did all sensation down my entire right leg. I’d never been so happy to be pain-free. Was this the price I was going to pay? I wondered. At that point I didn’t care. I didn’t even consider not being able to ride my Harley ever again. I was still in awe of no more pain.
Problems began when I tried standing the next day. Wanting to go to the loo, up till then I’d been out of it on meds, and crawling. The outer side of my thigh, back of my knee, outer side of my calf, outer side of my foot, entire sole, heel, and three toes didn’t exist. I know. I took my sharp embroidery scissors, and points open, poked them in the entire length to check. Nothing. A few specks of blood is all.
Standing got easier. No pain. Lovely, but also no feeling. Returning to the doctor for his comments on the second MRI I was informed my body had done the surgery for him, and it was no longer required. He had seen it happen a couple of times. It appeared my vertebrae, unhappy with the state of affairs had taken matters into their own hands—or should that be bones—and excised the offending piece. He advised me that it would remain floating around in my back.
That statement made me re-consider something that happened 24 yrs ago. I slipped a disc lifting my son off the floor when he was a baby. A short while later, a lump appeared on the left side of my back. It’s still there today, like a piece of gristle. I’ll let you know if the same happens on the right side.
Its weird because I made my first incantation a few days earlier asking my body to pull together in sorting this out. I also decided afterwards, for a really silly reason, to go out on my motorbike one last time, realising I might never be able to ride one again. The potholes might have had something to do with it, but I was careful.
Consultant says, the paralysis is normal, (wish he’d told me that before), and sensation should gradually return. If it doesn’t, I’m planning to discuss my first tattoo with a local artist, phobia be dammed.
This issue has overshadowed my month, but I still managed to complete Chicken Wizard. It’s at the cover designer and formatter now. Already lined up my printing company as my usual one can’t cover picture books the way I want them. Would love an agent for these, but I know it’s not going to happen. Deep into Between Here & Hell. About to start Shea Pingle and the Swarm.
Other activities continue apace. Been to a Ladies night. Did a signing and selling event in Faversham, have another in Herne Bay on;
Saturday 22nd April at Herne Bay High school.
Did a ride-out to the Heritage Sprint event at Betteshanger Park. Was a bit dubious but managed fine. Luckily I’m left footed, so always lean to the left. Right foot only ever use inner part of foot and big toe. Amazing what you discover, even at my age.
Managed to get to grips with the layout for my writing group’s next anthology Indigo, so that’s in progress. A new layout and newly designed cover being developed.
If you’d like to keep up-to-date on my blogs, reviews, and podcasts, please consider subscribing to my email list. I’ll ensure you recevie a copy directly they are created. Use my contact page on the back of my website.
Covid, Chickens, and Codeine.
In 2020, the Faversham Eye on-line newspaper announced a competition. We had Covid going on, so they aptly entitled the entries, Life After Covid.
It was a dark time. I had plenty of time of my hands, my mind, and my imagination. So I entered, not thinking I'd get anywhere. I hadn't got anywhere in the other comps I'd entered over the years.
Following the country's mood, I decided to make it dark, very dark. I considered worst case scenarios, and as usual followed my instincts, not knowing where the story was leading me.
I didn't expect to win. I actually found out by mistake. A few weeks after the closure date, I decided to get the courage up to read the winning entries in their paper. I'd received no contact from the paper, so assumed someone else had won. I almost fell off my chair. I had to re-read it several times. I read the runners-up. They were okay, not emotional, not urgent like mine. More descriptive.
I was elated until I noticed they'd spelt my name wrong. I contacted them to tell the paper it was me who'd won and also request they amend my surname. They could do this on-line but not in hard copy because the print run was done. I wish I'd been their proof editor!
Its taken me some time to float down on my airy cloud after that. Nothing new has happened. I purchased several hard copies of the edition it was published in. I name dropped - a lot. It made me feel like a proper writer at last. Someone actually liked it. I like it too. I've had a number of folk ask me for the book, seeing this as the first chapter in a dystopian world - which it is.
Currently, I'm really busy with From Here to Hell which is going to need such a re-write no one is going to recognise it. Chicken Wizard is around the corner. Shea Pingle in in the wings (literally), and Mustard and Marmalade are poking their heads above the parapet. Had enough clichés?
My illustrator for CW is doing Shea Pingle too. Check out the blurry draft image on the Shea Pingle page here. I'm currently interviewing a 2nd illustrator for Mustard and Marmalade - no confirmed name yet.
The pop-up Bookshop in Broadstairs did quite well, I sold a few copies. Chris Horn plans to run another couple through the year. I ended up buying 4 books, and it was fascinating to meet all the writers and feel part of a 'tribe'. Yes I learnt some new words last night on a writers social. Just trying to keep you updated, we don't want to fall behind on the world social scene. Tribe describes, your social group these days. I also received an education on Gammon and Karen which left me speechless. In turn I shared my word, which a couple of folk didn't know, vivarium. Not on a par with the others but still I knew it, and they didn't, so I had a brief nano-second of smugness.
On a personal front, I'm likely to have some time to move the above novel onwards due to heading off for spinal surgery in the next four weeks. Yes I'm terrified, but if I wait any longer I'll be part owner of the companies who manufacture, Paracetamol, Ibuprofen, Codeine, Tramadol, Co-codamol, & Voltarol at this rate.
I'm more gutted about not being allowed to do Karate, street dance and yoga for a minimum of three months. No driving for 2 - 4 weeks and worse still probably no Harley out for eons. Sad face emoji.
Till next time.
Please give me a thumbs up if you like my words, sometimes I feel like I'm writing in a vacuum. Or should that be hoover? Feel free to comment.
23, My Lucky Lottery Number?
In January, I was thinking I had a few months to relax before the start of my hectic author signing commitments for 2023. I’ve booked twenty-three events so far. Along with my literary festivals, and weekend-long ComiCon’s, I’ve a gaming convention, classic car weekend, and a large number of craft Fairs dotted around the county.
We’re in February and my first event now starts next weekend. Chris Horn, another local author, is taking a leaf out of my book. This time he’s beat me to it and managed to organise his very own Pop-up Bookshop. And he’s invited yours truly to sell her books there. Thanks Chris.
The event runs from Friday 24th to Sunday 26th February, at 27 Albion street, Broadstairs. There are books to suit everyone’s taste, including mine of course. Twenty-three authors are bringing their wares, and many, like me (I’m doing Saturday afternoon and Sunday all day) will be there to sign their books so you can get a unique copy.
My Aquasapien Metamorphosis signed copy is currently selling for £22 on Book Depository and Amazon. I’ve realised what I need to do is sign them and put them direct on Amazon myself for £22. I knew I’d gone wrong somewhere!
Please consider coming to visit the shop over the weekend, just putting your face in the door to support us would be amazing. Its near Bradstow Mill pub I believe.
On another topic, writing (what else LOL) Last night saw me finish my seventh novel renamed Between Here and Hell. Originally, it was Between Worlds because that’s where they go, but I decided it wasn’t the whole story so renamed it. I’ve got to think of a cover next and of course edit it until I’m brain weary. Can’t believe at 75,000 words I was thinking it’s not far from finished, I’ll just do a few more pages and that will be it. I finished it at over 98,000 words and I’m guessing it won’t be ending there once editing changes are made.
I’ve noticed a pattern in this blog I didn’t see at the beginning. It’s the year 2023. I’m doing 23 events, there are 23 authors going to the Pop-up bookshop and I’ve written 23,000 words. If the lottery comes up with number 23 in it this week, let me know, and if you win millions think of this aspiring writer who assisted you in reaching your dream. A few bob would come in quite nicely about now.
Christmas? What Christmas?
Where did Christmas go? Yesterday, I was looking for pressies to give to relatives. Today, I’m wondering what exciting thing to give my loved one for Valentine’s Day.
I know it is a sign of getting older when the days race by. As a child, a day took a week, a week a month, and a year was so far off I couldn’t remember it. Now, as each days passes, it vanishes like an hour. The whole phenomenon in reverse, as a week becomes a day, and a month a week, and a year? Feels like yesterday.
So, am I going to sit and watch my life flit by like a concertina? The hell I am. This year, resolutions ignored. I’m doing more than ever. So far I’ve booked over 23 events with 5 local organisers, and am considering not two, (my usual amount) but five Comicon events in 2023. Okay, I might not do all of them due to expenses of hotel, travel etc, but I’ve already booked the South-East Collectors and Gaming convention in October at Ardingly showground.
Comicon-wise I’m defo going to Wyntercon, but also maybe Portsmouth, Birmingham and Bournemouth. I’m looking at Fantasycon 2023 too. Fantasycon rarely comes out of the USA. The last time it came to the UK and I went was 2014 I hadn’t published anything then. I met Terry Pratchett, Robin Hobb ran a writing session, and Brian Aldiss kissed me on the cheek. (Yes, I have washed it since.) Just gutted I didn’t have one of his books with me. I met and made some fabulous friends that weekend, some of whom I’m still in contact with today. I’d love to go again this year, with six novels under my belt, I feel more bonefide as an author.
In addition, Book wise, Chicken Wizard half-way complete. Shea Pingle and the Swarm written and waiting to begin illustrations. Between Worlds proceeding slowly and Mustard and Marmalade Daushund Dog Detectives is hassling me. Sackful of Dragons is on the back burner whilst I get the picture books out in preparation for the summer shows.
Caterpillars, Cats & Christmas.
First, I would like to give a huge thank you to the eight people who gave me a thumbs up on my last blog. It’s a first for me. It made me feel so humble to know that someone out there does actually read my words—I was beginning to think I imagined it—and also took a couple of seconds at the end to click LIKE too. Thank you who ever you are. Because of this I’m going to continue blogging. I’ll admit I was starting to get a teeny bit dispirited.
Christmas is almost upon us, and before you ask I haven’t written a Christmas story, but I have completed Shea Pingle and the Swarm, hot on the heels of Chicken Wizard (WC). That’s two new children’s picture books written. I just need the illustrators to make them a reality. Ellie is hard at work getting through the pictures for WC (not to be confused with Water Closet) but there’s only so much one girl can do. I know she is trying to do her college work too and I don’t want to mess that up for her.
Mustard and Marmalade Dachshund Dog Detectives are still in my head at the outline stage. The first two books are rhyming stories, and I haven’t decided yet whether to continue the theme with The Case of the Missing Fillet Steaks. Not sure how much rhyming I can do around a butcher’s shop, but you never know.
I’ve finished all my signings and selling for 2022, and sadly haven’t got any bookings for 2023 until May. Unless you know someone who’s got an event I could fit in between now and then. You can of course order books through Waterstones or contact me direct. I’m happy to deliver locally.
I actually get most of my ideas and do a lot of my writing whilst at signings and Comicons etc. I think it might be the overwhelming environment of creative people within eye and earshot. The colours, the activities, the sounds. I also can’t resist purchasing items, either for myself personally or as set dressing for the table (that’s my excuse). Only last week I ended up buying a eight-foot furry caterpillar whilst I was in a toy shop. Do I need it? No. Is it for someone else? No. Is it set dressing? No. It needed me, and I needed it. Currently, Cleo the caterpillar is gracing our king-sized bed—my husband is so understanding!
I’m not sure whether I’m eccentric or still in child-mode—probably a bit of both— each room in the house boasts at least 20+ fluffy toy animals. Each is unique. Each has a name, or a function in a number of cases. For example, a blackbird on top of the sofa means one of the downstairs windows is open and needs closing before we go out. Okay, maybe that is the only one with a function, apart from the four or five animal doorstops. One cat, one mouse, one panda, one horse, one kingfisher. (I didn’t include them in the room count.)
I believe this all ties in with my love of fantasy. The famous Toy story films are right up my alley. I love things that make me go “ahhh”. Only the other day at work my colleagues announced that I was so easy to buy Christmas presents for. I wasn’t sure whether to be pleased with that statement or slightly irritated that I’m such a predictable person. I like to see myself as slightly edgy and unpredictable, but apparently not, judging by their smiles when they made me open the present in front of them. Yes, another of my weaknesses is hairbands and they purchased me some hum-dingers. I couldn’t make up my mind which one to wear for the rest of the day. Thank you ladies – I love them. That brings my hairband count to well over 50+
I’m sure there are folk reading this who also have there own unique indulgences. I’ve heard of people who collect owls, hedgehogs, elephants, tigers, (not real ones) and other curiosities. I myself have a few cats (I have a lot of cats!) from a specific pottery in Cornwall. They adorn the mantlepiece, the display cabinet being too full of other animals (and cats). Is it something we do as we age? I don’t think so. I think people have an affinity with a certain item, an element, something that calls to them and gives them enjoyment, to see it, hold it, interact with it, like books. Some come with memories, like ornaments from grand parents or aunts, some come from holidays, I have a blue goose in our downstairs loo from Disney World in the 1990’s. Some just speak to us. To me.
I’d love to hear what other people collect and how they choose to take home that specific object.
Anyway, till next year. I hope you all receive that one thing you want for Christmas, especially if its for your collection. Take care, keep safe and remember, we are all unique. There is noone else like you in the world, but someone else might just like fluffy animals too.
Dragons & Pegasus
Thank you to everyone who came to my Aquasapien Three book launch at Taddy's Barn. It was a great success, sold lots of copies and several folk discovered a new location for a great breakfast and a smashing weekend lunch.
Although it was only a little over three weeks ago, it feels likes months. I've already done another signing and selling Craft Fair at Faversham on the 5th of November and I'm booked for the Christmas Fair at St Augustine's, Canterbury Road, Westgate on Sunday the 27th of November. The trilogy makes a great Christmas present for an avid reader of any age, especially if signed by the author.
Its onward and upward writing wise. Chicken Wizard in proceeding apace, thanks to Ellie my illustrator for the story. I've two more pictures books waiting to bust out my head, Shea Pingle the fairy, whose job role is Bee Botherer and also Mustard and Marmalade Dog Detectives, two dacshunds who uncover crimes.
I'm still reviewing my novel Between Worlds and not sure if I'm going to keep the title. Maybe Arianne and the Hounds of Hell. After I've tweaked it, my friend has offered to Beta read it. Then it'll probably be back to editing the content again because she is so thorough. A Sackful of Dragons is on the slow burner about a third written.
You may like to know I'm having T-shirt made of Dog, the dragon in the Witch on the Warpath trilogy, and also the Pegasus from Quest for Courage. Great pressies too.
Go to go now as off to the Mulberry Tree pub Margate to meet some fellow writers, instead of Karate tonight due to impinged spinal nerve. Not sure what goes on at the group, will let you know.
Till next time.
PS - Nobody ever comments on my blogs, so maybe live dangerously and sent me a thumbs up, just so I know I'm not alone in the world.
AND NOW FOR THE SIXTH NOVEL
This evening I arrived home to check on the progress of my latest novel Aquasapien-Prodigy. It has been at the printers being turned literally from fiction into reality. I’ve monitored it being cut and sized, then bound, and now the official email reads, “arriving tomorrow.”
People ask me many times, what bit of the writing process I enjoy most and it's difficult to give them a satisfactory answer. I love writing that initial first draft as the story jumps from my mind to the page. I love reviewing it, and turning it into a deeper, more meaningful story.
Surprisingly, I love reviewing the edits, and adding even more depth. I love it when I’ve finished writing, when I start the cover design process, when it returns from formatting looking like a real book. I guess the most nerve-racking part is when it goes to the printer. Fortunately, I have the foresight to ensure I receive a sample hard copy to review, which in itself is precious.
When my print Manager Jozane emails me to say, “Your books are on their way.” My tension rises. But the most exciting part of all? When the books arrive, all bundled up in their brown paper wrappings, inside their snug boxes smelling glorious, and I unpack them to sell at the first book launch.
I make absolutely no apology for blatantly advertising my next book launch here now.
Eager readers of Carol M. Salter’s first books in the Aquasapien series, will be delighted to know Aquasapien—Prodigy, the long-awaited sequel, set eighteen years later, is about to be released.
Bored with his life at an elite English boarding school, American student Lewis Blaine, decides to abscond. He embarks on the adventure of his life, following his dream to travel the world. Unfortunately, Lewis gets more than he bargained for from the outset.
Meanwhile, Unit One, the highly valued mercenary team, has continued its missions across the globe, taking down corrupt villains. A surprise call for help from Lewis’s mother takes the team to high alert.
This is Carol’s second novel published this year, and her sixth full-length novel so far, with more planned, and it’s not the last in the Aquasapien series.
Carol continues to write, market her work and work full-time. Currently, she is working on several exciting fantasy stories, including branching into the younger, picture book arena with Chicken Wizard planned for release in 2023.
Carol’s other novels will be available to purchase at the launch. If you are unable to make the launch, you can order all her work from Waterstones, or via the EStore Store – Wayside Publications (phy.sx)
TADDY’S BARN TEA ROOMS has kindly offered to host the Aquasapien- Prodigy launch on:
SATURDAY 29 TH OCTOBER 2022 FROM 10 AM TO 2 PM.
East Northdown Garden Nursery,
George Hill Rd,
Broadstairs CT10 3BN
(Full disabled access, free parking, and on the Loop bus route.)
What a hectic but brilliant weekend at Wyntercon Eastbourne. Admittedly, I didn't sell many books, but frankly I'm hooked. Who wouldn't be, when a plethora of role models from my childhood, teenage years and adulthood marched past my table every twenty minutes or so, bringing to life the worlds I only knew in my mind and the books I read.
Who wasn't terrified by Dr Who and the Daleks as a child? I used to have nightmares regularly about them chasing me and having to hide in the cupboard under the stairs at home. This weekend, I stood next two inert daleks and watched one human version cavort around the halls.
Star Trek was my mainstay as a teenager. I thought Mr Spock intriguing, Doctor McCoy a pain, Chekov hilarious and had a soft spot for Captain Kirk and Zulu. Into these two initial series stepped Star Wars, represented in full at Wyntercon by the gorgeous Storm Troopers, the graceful Princess Leia, several of which floated around the event.
Jawa stole most of the show this weekend, with his kleptomania antics, whilst Chewbacca strode like a God - yes Thor came too - amongst us bringing a startling touch of reality to proceedings. Other SW characters filled the building, and behind them the eerie Spirit Walker stalked us all.
Minecraft was a permanent fixture for young and old, and Master Chief, my personal heartthrob joined us too.
Downstairs, there were rooms for children to craft and create their own heroes, and another for them to meet and greet their role models. Yes, I was very envious being stuck at my table for the majority of the hours, and I'm sure I wasn't alone in that yearning.
I could continue raving about the Marvel characters, the Anime lookalikes and the many other film and television folk racing by, but it's probably much easier if you look on them.
Go to MY WORK, PAST EVENTS on my website carolmsalter.com and click on each photo. you'll see the stars of yesteryear, today and tomorrow.
I spend much of my thoughts imagining that maybe, just maybe, one of my characters might be walking these halls in a distant future. I can dream.
MY THANKS TO ANDY AND THE MARVELLOUS TEAM OF VOLUNTEERS
WHO MADE THIS EVENT OFFICIALLY AWESOME.
Almost at the end of the month and I’ve never been so busy. The beginning saw us away on hols in Spain for a week, which was amazing and extremely hot at 47 degrees. Fortunately, the temperature dropped to a balmy 41. Seville has lots of interesting places and our hotel was fantastic. Definitely will stay there again, maybe not at the height of summer next time. See my Podcast, highlighting my sights, and the hotel, on my YouTube channel – Carol M. Salter.
Whilst it was great being away, my mind remained in the UK. I’d finished the final write of Aquasapien three Prodigy and needed to liaise with my formatter, cover designer and printing company. I can say trying to orchestrate this via my Samsung phone was a mite stressful. In the end, I did what holidays away from home are made for – I let go and enjoyed the scenery and food.
Leaving the home environment, where ever you go is beneficial. You are physically unable to do those household chores calling to you, from scrubbing the toilet (which I did on my return) and tarting up the garden, to sorting out your next publication. And that holiday needn’t be abroad. Staycations are just as good, be that camping (read further for details on that saga) to staying with rellys.
I returned chilled, relaxed and fired up for completion of Aqua three and continuation of Chicken Wizard, not to mention my latest draft, Between Worlds.
Of course, we didn’t stay home, that would have been too easy. Off we zoomed to our next engagement, the Rewind 80’s Music Festival at Henley. We were camping!
The event itself was officially brilliant, and our six friends were great too. The actual camping? Not so much. Sure, we’d done loads in our 20’s and 30’s, MAG rallies, Crazy Days & other biker events. Those days on a motorbike with tiny two-man tent, bed rolls and sleeping bags.
These days we had a much more comfortable four-man tent with stand-up seating area. Sounds great in theory. Watching my hubby struggle in some strong winds to insert poles into various orifices, then hammer pegs into a solid stone ground, was not so much fun. He bent more pegs than he got in.
Another surprise was the size of the place and distance from A to B. We parked in one field of cars and using my trusty festival trolley moved the first of our goods down through that field, and the next to the entrance.
“Oh,” I exclaimed, “The tents are here.”
No, they weren’t. That field was full. Apparently folk arrived at 4am!!! Hubby yanked the trolley through that field too, around a corner and into another field, which was also two-thirds full. While he set up, I offered to go get our second haulage in the trolley.
Off I crawled, yanking the empty trolley behind me. After two fields I’d had enough. This was not a nice grassy field like we’d expected, this was a stony, uneven surface that looked like horses had rampaged through it – regularly. I collapsed the trolley and hefting it up, held it against my body and continued to walk, and walk, and walk.
By the fifth or fifteenth row, I’d had enough. I threw the trolley to the ground. I couldn’t find the damn car. My little Kiora is a low-to-the-ground car and likes to find herself. This is a common occurrence when I go anywhere. I spend minutes trying to locate my erstwhile transport, flicking my remote back and forth like a metal detector in supermarket carparks.
“There she is!”
I scampered off down the row from where I stood, in the blazing sun, after spying a tiny orange roof in the distance. Running up the rows I reached her, dropped the trolley which by now I’d gone back to yanking and felt for my remote. Nothing.
I couldn’t believe it, somewhere in the gigantic, hellhole of a field I’d lost my key. That did it. The trolley got thrown to the ground – again – and kicked for good measure too. My bag was inside my car, with my phone and all my personal items. I sobbed hysterically and noone really noticed. Well, they did, but you could see their reaction in their eyes, “I’m not going over to her, she’s mad. I’m on holiday.”
After thinking it through, I realised I must have lost them somewhere in the blasted field from hell, all I could do was backtrack, sobbing as I walked. I found them nestled in the grass in row five. By the time I returned to the car I needed the Ventolin, which was also inside.
Its put me off camping, despite by husband purchasing stronger tent pegs today and my niece offering to lend us her blow-up tent. We had VIP toilets (paid extra) which were over two fields away. The arena field was four fields away. I walked 35,000 steps that day, an all time record according to my Fitbit. I felt every single one. Okay, a fair bit was dancing about to Level 42 and Holly Johnson.
Lesson learnt the hard way. Don’t put your key remote down your bra when camping.
Aquasapien three now at printers. Potential Launch date 29th October in sight.
Chicken Wizard illustrations in progress. Sneak preview of Chicken Wizard himself, next blog.
Sorry this is a bit longer than usual.